The Holiday Blues

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I survived Thanksgiving! I can’t say that I did not stuff myself, because I did. I also just barely survived my in-laws. I love my husband’s family very much, but sometimes they can be just a bit too much for me.

Now that Thanksgiving has passed I find myself in a slump. This is the time of year when I start to really miss those family members who have passed away. It is also the time of year when I become even more aware of my physical limitations, most of which are 100% treatable. How would they be treated? Oh, by me losing 180 pounds or so.

180 pounds! That is more than half my weight! The realization sets in that I am literally the size of 2 people.. or 3 super skinny people. Either way, the stress on my joints and heart is not going to take it forever. I am already feeling it. At 43 years of age I have difficulty with so many daily tasks that I should have no problems with:

  • Getting out of bed
  • Getting in and out of the car
  • Climbing stairs
  • Picking something up off the floor
  • Tying my shoes
  • Sleeping

The list is much more lengthy, but you get the picture. This is not a “poor me” blog. This is keeping it real and keeping my accountability.

There have been a few public figures who lost their lives at around my age lately and this is really hitting home for me. Specifically, Heavy D and, just yesterday, Patrice O’Neal. I know, they are both African-American men so what do they have in common with me? They were both around my age and both were obese. It is just a reality check for me is all.

Today, I am sticking to my original plan of not tracking everything and ignoring the scales; however, I will pay closer attention to what I am eating and the choices I make. I am determined to increase my chances that I will be here long enough to continue enjoying  my children and grandchildren. I also am determined to make my quality of life a little bit better. Like I have said before, I am so tired of existing and not living. Enough talking, it is time for action!

The first step is getting myself ready for February. You see, last April I signed up to participate in a 5K in February. At the time I figured it gave me enough time to train and get in better shape for it. Well, here I am in November, and I actually weigh about 15 pounds more than I did at the time. Every day I told myself “tomorrow” and tomorrow never arrived. So, I start today! Even if I finish dead last, I am determined that I will complete it.

I am adding a tab at the top of my page to track my 5K progress. Any suggestions from you on how a 300+ pound woman is going to get herself to the point where she can walk 3.1 miles by February 4th?

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About Diana

At 43 years old I have missed out on so much in life because I was too busy obsessing about my weight. Having spent so many years on the weight roller coaster, I have decided to just live and enjoy the journey instead of putting everything on hold for "someday when I am skinny". I am applying a few priciples that will allow me to just enjoy life: 1~ Drink my water. 2~ Enjoy my food 3~ Don't deprive myself of anything- portion control is my motto 4~ Throw the scale away (OK, I can't bring myself to throw it away,but I am giving it to my teenage son to hide from me) 5~ This one is the most important: LIVE LIFE!

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